Letters to You
by MissAlyssa108
Summary: Letters between Juli and Bryce. Thats it so far. R&R everybody now! Updated, due to the cute reviews, i cave to the begging :
1. His poem

I had watched Bryce for years. Now, I watched him plant her a Sycamore tree. I couldn't help thinking how sweet he was. No, I must meet Bryce in the right light, without a biased perspective. So, despite my ansy-ness, I was detemined t wait until tomarrow to talk to him.

I walked out of my house. It was a beautiful morning. I, despite my best efforts, had spent quite some time _getting ready._ For him. How twisted id that? He'd seen me covered in mud, not to mention with ripped pants after climbing the old Sycamore by the bus stop. It was weird that we hadn't really ever had a conversation, despite living right across the street for eachother basically all of my school career. It was also weird thathe had tryed to... _kiss_ me. Why had I turned away? Hadn't I been waiting for that kiss since second grade?

As I continued, I noticed anther oddity: There was a paper wraped around one of the sapplings tiny new braches. On the outside it said Juli, in a wobbly hand. Plus a smiley-face. What did THAT mean? I unrolled the note and read this:

Some times you laugh

When you want to cry

and sometimes you want

To just silently die.

Sometimes the tears flow,

No matter how hard yu try

To hold it all in.

Sometimes you smile through tears

That just don't seem to dry.

Sometimes you're disgusted by

what you find when you look inside

and Sometimes you cringe at

Who you've become.

And then you realize

Everything's gone wrong.

Sometimes all the courage

You muster is not enough

It's your fault, It's over

There's no saying sorry

For all of that stuff

Sometimes you wish

n a far-away star

That this is a nightmare

And good things still are.

That this is a dream

And escape is just a blink away,

But, it's not,

at least not that way.

The past's down the drain

All thanks to you,

And now you must take blame.

The Friend Ship has sailed n without you.

You shiver and shake, tho yu're not cold.

Just lonely, missing Something

or Someone, truth be told

I am sorry and I know

That sorry sorry doesn't cut it

Iknow that hate can

Overpower love

When trust is breeched

And loyalty broken

I hope you can heal

Without me watching

Because I know my presence

Isn't quite helping.

If you don't ever forgive me,

I'd understand.

Some hurts are too deep

For me to comprehend.

I'm suffering too, you'd better believe it

Because, dispite it all,

I miss you, I miss it.

It's my fault, that I know.

I feel wretched, don't doubt it.

I'm rotten inside and shouldn't bother

Trying to change my exterior,

Because what really needs work

Is my hidden interior.

I'm so sorry

And that, dear Juli,

Is never enough

Because once someone hurts you,

That's someone you can't trust.

I miss you

I miss it.

Sorry

Hope this is enough :)

XO Bryce"

Did he really mean XO like, hugs and ... KISSES! I was so relived. I needed a second chance for that kiss and it looked like I was gonna get it. All That was left to do was walk across the street and ring a stinkin' doorbell.

**R&R! It's a one-shot for now, unless you beg for more. **

**Love**

**~Miss Alyssa**


	2. Reply

**Hi, everyone! Due to some begging, i have decided to continue! remember, no garantees unless you review. You know that little button down there? ya, i love that button. And it loves you. So, make us all happy. Click it... You know you want to! **

**i have 4 more chapies in my journal, but they change every time i write them out, usually getting longer so it might take a while to post 'em. Sorry!**

**Enjoy!**

For the first time in my life, I , Julia Baker, felt shy I gingerly passed my tree, ever so slowly walking to the edge of the street. a slight movement caused me to look up. i saw Bryce's window hangings swing as if the owner had hastily drawn them.

Bryce had been watching me.

I didn't quite know WHAT to feel, it was all so complicated in my heart... But, i am resolved: I am totally flipped, at any other time in life, if you had told me that Bryce Loski had been watching me i would've run to him and found my way into his arms, whether he liked it or not. Now, I ran away, into the sanctuary of my house, slamming the door behind me.

I hated my heart. Even thinking of him made it jump and bump and flutter like trapped butterlies. Smaller ones had taken up residence in my stomach, and i couldn't get them to quiet down.

i marched up to my room, and sat down at my desk facing the window. I read his note. once. Twice. Three times. I opened the top drawer on the right, i rummaged through the old school work until i found the knob that opened the false bottom and drew out my Little Book of Thoughts. i hate to admit that most of the thoughts included or were all about him.i doubted, even with my new resolution, that that was going to change. i flipped through the pages carelessly. This well worn, nondescript little notebook had been a companion and an outlet when i had so few true ones, now I took it for granted.

of course, Bryce's name stood out several times a page. My eye was well-trained. i opened to a blank, white, college ruled page. This notebook had seen it all, rain, tears... i got a pencil from the black, chalk board mug on the upper corner of the desk. This mug was very special, it was a present from uncle David. Of course Dad had helped pick it out, but it was still my favorite birthday present ever. When i opened it, it had said HAPPY BIRTHDAY! in pink and green chalk, written in Davids unsteady hand. Now it read Be Strong in electric blue.

Be strong... Be STRONG!

i wrote the salutation; Bryce. No Dear, i was playing a difficult game; hard to get. _No, Julia you DO NOT want him anymore! but you do... Shut up!_ great, now i was arguing with my self. Still Dear was an unnecessary pleasantry. we are talking to the enemy here. _Whatever... *smirk._ I wanted to tell him my heart had always beat with and because of his, but i musn't get ahead of myself...So, instead i wrote:

_Bryce,_

_The tree is lovely, and the poem too. But, I'm not sure if that makes up for years of... pain. _

hahaha, wonder what he'll make of that! my pencil hovered... but

_I need to get to know you. Unbiased. i've got to understand you now, as i should have. As i never have. That's step one, as it should have been all those years ago._

my pencil had flown across the page, yet the writting matched that above was enought. Close it up, or... nothing good will happen.

_Let's just start over. A clean slate, for you as well as me. ok?_

_Friendliest Regards,_

_julie_

i was sure that friendliest regards was perfect, not too cold, not too warm.

my signature is very loopy. he'll be able to read it.

i peered out my window, across to his. The curtain was swishing again... ah, well, better for him if he saw, so he could find the note... i fassened it to the tree, the same branch his had been on, all the while feeling his eyes burning the back of my neck.

**i'm thinking of actually writting her Book of Thoughts. might be interesting... Tell me what you Think!**

**~ Love, Lyssie**


	3. Anxiety

**A.N This is for LaLaMichelle who begged for more. Sorry it's tiny but it was hard to pick it up after so long. R&R **

I watched her carefully attach a note to her tree. On the same branch, and in the same way as I had. I peered out of my bedroom window, curiosity peaked. This wasn't like the Julie I knew. She would have marched right over and talked to me, but as soon as the paper was secured with the twine to the branch she turned and disappeared through her front door. She nearly saw me too, but I think I dropped the curtain just in time.

I desperately tried not to run down the stairs, but I couldn't help it. It didn't seem like I was forgiven, but I still had the impossible hope that perhaps I was. The door was whipped open and slammed and I was across the street in a flash, tugging at the devilishly tight knot. Mine had been loose on purpose, and it was almost as if she didn't want me to read it.

Eventually the scrap was freed and I eagerly unrolled it. Not bothering to leave, I sat down in the shade and read her carefully penned letter. It was calm but friendly. It was infuriating how distanced she seemed to have become. I almost missed the Elementary School Julie, the brash girl who could never be gotten rid of, or dissuaded from following me or sniffing my hair during class. But, the clean slate idea was a good one. I had done so many things that had hurt her, and was grateful for a second chance, no matter how grudgingly it was offered.

I looked up at the window I knew was hers longingly. I wished she would be looking out, as I had been moments ago. I knew even before I looked that she wasn't watching me. I would have felt it if she had. I had grown to be able to feel her eyes whenever they were trained on me, as they had been for most of my school career. I missed that feeling more than I had ever disliked it. And man, let me tell you I HATED the fact she was always watching me. It drove me nuts. Now, it feels like I can't live without that feeling or that knowledge.

Disheartened, I stood and trudged back the way I had come, slowly ascending the staircase and moping into my room, closing the door silently behind me. I sat with my hands covering my face wondering what to do. I doubted she would see me yet, even if I did go over for that very purpose or even call. I would be treated as I had been before the notes and the tree. Nothing I did seemed to matter, but I was by no means going to give up. She had said she would met me. Now just to coax her out.

**So there you go. i have been swamped with homework so I've no idea if i'll write more. i only will if you say you wanna see more. Thanks for all the reviews and such. Constructive critisism and plot ideas welcome**

**Luv**

**MissAlyssa**


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